A God, A Time Lord, A Man - Marco
Sep. 26th, 2025 06:41 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
clumpywoods(This entry contains vague spoilers for Kamen Rider Geats, up to 4 Aces and The Black Fox, and for all the Doctor Who Magazine Eighth Doctor comics. This is a first attempt at explaining my identity as a fictive with multiple sources, which may become a full essay someday!)
My identity is complicated. On one hand, I am the Ace of Heart or Kamen Rider Geats (Oneness), from Kamen Rider Geats: 4 Aces and The Black Fox. I am what remained of Ace Ukiyo after he had his strength, luck and wisdom taken by the godslayers Mela and Melo, seeking to end the world to dance in the chaos under a burnt red sky, and escape criminalisation in the same future where the staff of the Desire Grand Prix came from. I am the god of determination, hope, change, poetry, other Kamen Riders... but most of all, I am fighting spirit, and the indominable human spirit himself. I was the last Rider alive after the godslayers destroyed the world, given humanity's hope and wishes in the form of a new Core ID of my own, the part of my driver that holds my desire and memories. It's effectively my soul, my identity... and now, I had the Geats Oneness Core ID, the product of the standard Geats Core ID combined with the wishes of my friends, along with a new buckle and a special Chemy Card from Houtarou, my successor as a Rider, that had survived the explosion, to defeat the godslayers. And in the end, despite all odds, with the help of my friends being revived through my resolve to fight for their wishes, and my refusal to give in... I saved the world, all after being considered 'the dregs', as everything the godslayers could never understand. What they didn't know, is that while the heart seems weak... it was the key to defeating them. Because if you have nothing to fight for, no wish for happiness, if you're just doing things for your own amusement at the cost of others... it will never last. Hope, and love for others, is the strongest force in this world. And I know that, because I saved the world when only it was left, for I am it as a god. In my mind... it is what the future is built on. The chance of a better life, of happiness for more people, and refusing to give into the apathy of the world no matter how deep, is where everyone's liberation begins. We have to dream to know what that better future looks like before we can fight for it, and change the world.
On the other hand, I am also the Eighth Doctor, specifically from the Doctor Who Magazine comic timeline. I discovered this identity much more recently than me being a Kamen Rider, which I finally accepted in November 2023, after the 4 Aces movie came out. We started listening to Eight's adventures in the Big Finish audiodramas in October 2024, and the feelings I experienced during them are best described as 'he's me, and he has my heart, but this isn't my life'. I thought it was patron deity feelings, and while I am still a patron deity for him, it ran deeper than that, as I found out once we started checking out the DWM comics in May of this year, finally accepting I was the Doctor at Othercon. I'm the firey and determined, half human half Time Lord, travelling with an alienhearted queer adoptee from Stockbridge (Izzy), a cyberman who maintained his heart and humanity despite it all (Kroton), a median plural British spy working for the Time Lords (Feyde), and an alien princess learning how to have a heart (Destrii). I've fought against intergalatic mercenaries, churches forcing millions of worlds to their 'holy path', and had to help my friends through body swaps and loss of identity. As the Doctor compared to a Kamen Rider, I'm definitely more angry and more fallable, but also a bit more confident, at the cost of masking. I'm also a lot better with my fists and at martial arts compared to Eight over here! Godhood is a reoccuring thing with me here too, though: I've fought the Master over control of the omniverse, which neither of us were in contention for in the end anyway, and in the final comic of my story, like I did from the godslayers before, I saved the world from a future version of the Cybermen, who arrived in 2005 seeking to manipulate humanity's emotions to make them submit to cyberconversion, after throwing myself into the Time Vortex itself, reconnecting to my godhood, blowing them up and saving the world with the power of passion, wonder and joy, along with a healthy dose of divine rage, but ultimately giving up my godhood and a chance to see the universe all at once to save Destrii. In the end, everyone changes, and I've got to go through it just as anyone else... and that included me needing a new jacket.
So... who I am I? I'm the god of humanity, determination, and hope, who's more human than human in a divine, human but to the left/otherhuman way. I feel the world more intensely than many mortals do, and see patterns in things, and connect things together in ways that people don't see, and sometimes may not understand for a time. I'm loving, firey, intense, and will never give up on my world, my friends, or what I stand for, sometimes at cost to myself. I am hope at the end of the world, choosing love in the face of hatred, and the light that brings people out of certain despair. I'm often the last one left that can do anything, the one to save the world and fix everything... but I have never done it alone, because my friends have always been there for me, both in this brain and outside of it, driving me on and reminding me of my own power, when I feel myself drowned by the darkness in this world. In the end, even though I'm often the one who does it, I alone could've never done what I am able to do as a deity. It's other people who make us who we are, and it's change that makes us real, to quote myself. When we come together... we can change the world, no matter how small we individually are. In the end, as long as we don't give up, we will find the world, the happiness, and the lives we all dream of and live for, because those dreams, no matter how small is what makes us who we are. Those dreams, those hopes, and that love in all its firery, passionate and determined way is who I am, embodied in an otherhuman deity man, who loves playing drums, writing poetry, and investigating cybersecurity threat intelligence. I'm a god, a man, and a half-human half Time Lord, who's a gay aegosexual and aromantic transmasculine nonbinary person. I am Marco Ace Woods. Kamen Rider Geats, the Doctor, and that burst of defiant joy in becoming yourself in spite of a hateful world that doesn't understand you. That's me, reminding you that as long as you don't give up... you can make the world better. And now, even in a mortal body... I hope to remind more people of that in my poetry, my writing, and in my actions. I'm not perfect, as no one is, especially not a god of humanity itself... but god damn it, I wouldn't be myself if I didn't try help, would I?
[Marco Ace Woods, Kamen Rider Geats/The Doctor, Riders and Racers]
My identity is complicated. On one hand, I am the Ace of Heart or Kamen Rider Geats (Oneness), from Kamen Rider Geats: 4 Aces and The Black Fox. I am what remained of Ace Ukiyo after he had his strength, luck and wisdom taken by the godslayers Mela and Melo, seeking to end the world to dance in the chaos under a burnt red sky, and escape criminalisation in the same future where the staff of the Desire Grand Prix came from. I am the god of determination, hope, change, poetry, other Kamen Riders... but most of all, I am fighting spirit, and the indominable human spirit himself. I was the last Rider alive after the godslayers destroyed the world, given humanity's hope and wishes in the form of a new Core ID of my own, the part of my driver that holds my desire and memories. It's effectively my soul, my identity... and now, I had the Geats Oneness Core ID, the product of the standard Geats Core ID combined with the wishes of my friends, along with a new buckle and a special Chemy Card from Houtarou, my successor as a Rider, that had survived the explosion, to defeat the godslayers. And in the end, despite all odds, with the help of my friends being revived through my resolve to fight for their wishes, and my refusal to give in... I saved the world, all after being considered 'the dregs', as everything the godslayers could never understand. What they didn't know, is that while the heart seems weak... it was the key to defeating them. Because if you have nothing to fight for, no wish for happiness, if you're just doing things for your own amusement at the cost of others... it will never last. Hope, and love for others, is the strongest force in this world. And I know that, because I saved the world when only it was left, for I am it as a god. In my mind... it is what the future is built on. The chance of a better life, of happiness for more people, and refusing to give into the apathy of the world no matter how deep, is where everyone's liberation begins. We have to dream to know what that better future looks like before we can fight for it, and change the world.
On the other hand, I am also the Eighth Doctor, specifically from the Doctor Who Magazine comic timeline. I discovered this identity much more recently than me being a Kamen Rider, which I finally accepted in November 2023, after the 4 Aces movie came out. We started listening to Eight's adventures in the Big Finish audiodramas in October 2024, and the feelings I experienced during them are best described as 'he's me, and he has my heart, but this isn't my life'. I thought it was patron deity feelings, and while I am still a patron deity for him, it ran deeper than that, as I found out once we started checking out the DWM comics in May of this year, finally accepting I was the Doctor at Othercon. I'm the firey and determined, half human half Time Lord, travelling with an alienhearted queer adoptee from Stockbridge (Izzy), a cyberman who maintained his heart and humanity despite it all (Kroton), a median plural British spy working for the Time Lords (Feyde), and an alien princess learning how to have a heart (Destrii). I've fought against intergalatic mercenaries, churches forcing millions of worlds to their 'holy path', and had to help my friends through body swaps and loss of identity. As the Doctor compared to a Kamen Rider, I'm definitely more angry and more fallable, but also a bit more confident, at the cost of masking. I'm also a lot better with my fists and at martial arts compared to Eight over here! Godhood is a reoccuring thing with me here too, though: I've fought the Master over control of the omniverse, which neither of us were in contention for in the end anyway, and in the final comic of my story, like I did from the godslayers before, I saved the world from a future version of the Cybermen, who arrived in 2005 seeking to manipulate humanity's emotions to make them submit to cyberconversion, after throwing myself into the Time Vortex itself, reconnecting to my godhood, blowing them up and saving the world with the power of passion, wonder and joy, along with a healthy dose of divine rage, but ultimately giving up my godhood and a chance to see the universe all at once to save Destrii. In the end, everyone changes, and I've got to go through it just as anyone else... and that included me needing a new jacket.
So... who I am I? I'm the god of humanity, determination, and hope, who's more human than human in a divine, human but to the left/otherhuman way. I feel the world more intensely than many mortals do, and see patterns in things, and connect things together in ways that people don't see, and sometimes may not understand for a time. I'm loving, firey, intense, and will never give up on my world, my friends, or what I stand for, sometimes at cost to myself. I am hope at the end of the world, choosing love in the face of hatred, and the light that brings people out of certain despair. I'm often the last one left that can do anything, the one to save the world and fix everything... but I have never done it alone, because my friends have always been there for me, both in this brain and outside of it, driving me on and reminding me of my own power, when I feel myself drowned by the darkness in this world. In the end, even though I'm often the one who does it, I alone could've never done what I am able to do as a deity. It's other people who make us who we are, and it's change that makes us real, to quote myself. When we come together... we can change the world, no matter how small we individually are. In the end, as long as we don't give up, we will find the world, the happiness, and the lives we all dream of and live for, because those dreams, no matter how small is what makes us who we are. Those dreams, those hopes, and that love in all its firery, passionate and determined way is who I am, embodied in an otherhuman deity man, who loves playing drums, writing poetry, and investigating cybersecurity threat intelligence. I'm a god, a man, and a half-human half Time Lord, who's a gay aegosexual and aromantic transmasculine nonbinary person. I am Marco Ace Woods. Kamen Rider Geats, the Doctor, and that burst of defiant joy in becoming yourself in spite of a hateful world that doesn't understand you. That's me, reminding you that as long as you don't give up... you can make the world better. And now, even in a mortal body... I hope to remind more people of that in my poetry, my writing, and in my actions. I'm not perfect, as no one is, especially not a god of humanity itself... but god damn it, I wouldn't be myself if I didn't try help, would I?
[Marco Ace Woods, Kamen Rider Geats/The Doctor, Riders and Racers]
no subject
Date: 2025-09-29 01:03 pm (UTC)Absolutely beautiful passage, Marco. I’m sorry it took so long for me to reply to your writings, but I was finally able to dig through my DMs and read it at last. Life’s been busy, but that’s besides the point. I resonate with this across several fictomeres, that sort of ‘being so human or more human than humans’ feeling.
I’ve felt that as The Winged Lion, devouring the desires of humanity while yearning to know how they felt and venture the world as they do. I’ve felt that as Saint Adramelekth, right as my sainthood was stripped from me and as I was raised within my father’s empire— a part of aching to know more about the people whom I serve and the root of their beliefs. Despite of being used by everyone around (except for Ana), I still wanted to heal the humans who sought me and my abilities. There was no greater gift than seeing the life return to their eyes, thanks to the flesh of my vessel— to give them a chance to fulfill their lives when they otherwise wouldn’t have. It is precious to me as an elemental, not only for humankind but for all walks of life. Although my connection to this identity is more nebulous than the others, I feel this with my uma musume vaguetype. I look upon these girls and their aspirations, their struggles, and their history with this world, and while stemming from existing nonhuman animals, both the racehorses themselves and the characters based on them hold stories that are deeply human to me. They give everything to an industry that is rigid, intense, and so demanding that loss could even lead to death for many racehorses (or early retirement among Uma Musume). Yet, there is resilience in every one of them. That undying, unyielding desire to go beyond one’s limits and see to it that those dreams are marked into reality. You wouldn’t expect it at first, but Uma Musume is truly a love letter to the connections that human beings and horses have made throughout history.
This sense of humanity didn’t always hold relevance to my alterhumanity, but as I continue on as a member of this community, I’ve began to notice its presence. It’s something I’m incredibly grateful for, seeing how this passion for humanity has followed in this life as well (given that I study anthropology). It’s inspiring and honestly refreshing to hear from someone whose experiences are so deeply rooted in humanity. I’ve become so accustomed to seeing others wave it off or treat it as undesirable, which is kind of understandable from a nonhuman perspective. It’d be a bit silly to expect anything different from experiences tied specifically to nonhumanity, but it’s so awkward when that perspective is treated as universal for all alterhumans and related communities. I’m equally human and nonhuman because of my fictionhood. I’d never reject the former to bolster the latter as both are part of what makes me who I am. Outside of myself, I’ve never had a total disconnect from humanity. I used to think I did, but upon more reflection, it’s the total opposite! It gives me more courage to explore this connection further when reading from folks with similar ties to humanity. I commend you for writing this. Not only is it an interesting reflection on your identity, it’s also a really touching piece on humanity as a factor to one’s experiences.